Thank you so much, Missy! I am honored! Humbled, even!
Here's how Missy determines who receives her award (from her post - in blue):
The following people are entitled to My New Favorites Award. In order to be considered for this award, your blog must be relatively new, I say with in the last 6 months. AND must evoke a response from me... Laughing out loud, Fit the bill for obnoxious, give me something useful in everyday life... You get the idea."
As it is my first award, I felt that I should write something heartfelt and profound.
Then I was stuck. Heartfelt? I can do that. Profound? Not so much.
I had one major question about the award:
WHY me? My brain immediately went to that dark place that tells me that I am not deserving. I hate it when THAT tape starts to play in my head. The tape that tells me that I suck, that I am a miserable wench, and not deserving of anything positive. I have earned nothing...it's either an accident, or I've successfully conned someone to think I'm a decent human being.
It's still surprising to me how quickly I fall into that pit of self-loathing, that rut. And like a rut in the mud or snow, my tires seem to be drawn to it (or in the case of my addled brain, my thoughts, get sucked right into that rut that has been in my head since childhood.
My more rational self realizes this stuff is not true. I am an okay person, I am a decent human being. Sure, I have flaws - we all do (don't worry, I'm not listing them here!). But I am truly NOT the horrible creature that exists in that dark corner of my mind.
Why is it that we can more easily recall the negative messages we receive - and apologize or otherwise gloss over the positive remarks we receive?
Or is that just me?
And Missy, what they say is true: You always remember your FIRST.