March 04, 2010

Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop - 3/04/10

It's Thursday, and time again to work on our mad writing skillz, all thanks to Mama Kat! Be sure to check out all the amazing responses to the prompts!

My prompt this week: 

Who blind-sided you? Write about a time someone caught you totally off guard.

Many years ago, in a a time that I refer to as BTB (Before The Boy), I lived in Nashville with my two daughters. I was doing my working mom/single mom gig. I wasn't dating anyone.

One weekend evening, I attended a co-worker's 50th birthday party (back when I thought 50 was old...oh, silly me). I even brought Betty a package of Depends as a gag gift (heck, even Whoopi Goldberg is talking about incontinence products now).

The room was filled with co-workers. I worked as a system manager at a medical lab testing facility - lots of lab techs and other folks who spent their day dealing with bodily fluids and lab instruments, as well as those who provided client support.

My department was in a hallway off the lab - we had to pass through a portion of the lab to get there each day. I had my regular "hello friends" - the people you greet as you make your way to your destination.

Anyway, back to the party. I'm a shy person, I'm not at all comfortable in large groups of people, so I'm sure I was hanging out near the periphery, watching the action of the more boisterous folks (and lab techs know how to party, let me tell you).

So there I am, socially inept and looking for the exit when Regina, one of my "hello friends" comes up. 

Imagine my shock as she walks right up to me, invading my personal space (and I'm strict about that), runs her hand through my hair and says, seductively (in my mind, anyway)...

"Are you having a good time?"

How many ways can I say EWWWWWWW? 

"Danger, Will Robinson!"

I could not get out of that place fast enough.

And I spent many months years the weekend wondering what kind of lesbian vibes I was giving out. Was it the one time that Regina volunteered to drive me to pick up my car at the dealership? Was it the "spiky dykey" hairdo I was sporting? Was I causing blips on the lab's lesbian gaydar (there was a huge gay and lesbian contingent at the lab)?

I starting dating (MEN, people) not long after, lest there be any more confusion about my sexual orientation.
 

17 comments:

  1. OMG LMAO that is hilarious!!!

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  2. Doh!!!! I'm glad you enjoy your personal space, as do I....

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  3. This is really funny...I mean, terribly awkward...but funny now that it's behind you.

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  4. Oh my....that's an awkward position. I mean, that's really weird.

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  5. Oh I have so been there and like you I ran, leaped, whatever it took to make an exit! I'd like to see a picture of the hairdo though?

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  6. Oh so awkward....although I can honestly say that has happened to me before, only it was in college and I went to a liberal arts school (I'm straight as well) - super awkward!

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  7. Getting hit on is awkward regardless of the orientation of the person doing the hitting. Being at work when it is happening makes it a bazillion times worse.

    Very funny!

    Visiting from Mama Kat's!

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  8. Hilarious! Visiting from Mama Kat'w

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  9. I'll have to write about time a gay colleague and I shared a table at a bar and rated the hotness of the men and the women entering. I learned a lot about what gay males consider attractive and indicative that night.

    My blindside moment was when a group I was with wondered into a gay bar in San Francisco without knowing it was a gay bar. The only time anyone has grabbed my @$$ in public (male ot female).

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  10. hahahaha, I got hit on by a girl at a bar, but I didn't know she was hitting on me. My then boyfriend (now hubby) had to point it out to me. I just thought she was friendly, lol! oh, and lab techs do know how to party, lol! Great post!

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  11. Oh no. My Mom made me and my sister have lesbian haircuts when we were little so she wouldn't have to do it. I didn't know what a lesbian was then but now when I look back at the pictures I am quick to point it out to her : )

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  12. I'd have starting dating too! Or put up in appropriate Playgirl calanders around my desk.
    Oh, BTW, Happy March! Hope this month is good for you!

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  13. Odd...awkward...weird. Did she have too much to drink? Did they put something in the punch? Everyone thought my hubby was gay before we started dating...I never figured out why. BUT he never got hit on.
    Holly
    504 Main

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  14. wow, bold, running her fingers through your hair. wow.

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  15. That is pretty darn bold!!! It is one thing to put out a tentative feeler ... another entirely to run your fingers through someone's hair!!!!!

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Thanks for stopping by. I love your comments...I get all warm inside just reading them!