March 31, 2011

Writer's Workshop: I Know What I Know...Ya Know?

Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop is one of my favorites! This week, I chose this prompt: What I Know for Sure

After decades of research, the crackerjack team of scientists in the Cleaver compound I have determined the following to be true:

  • Buttered toast ALWAYS falls butter side down when you drop it.
  • Any time I find a recipe I'm dying to make, when it's time to gather the ingredients, at least one thing will either be missing or past its expiration date.
  • There is no such thing as leftover pizza in the Cleaver household.
  • Invariably, when someone else is doing the cooking AND I'm wearing a white shirt, the entree includes tomato sauce.
  • Nobody accepts responsibility for any spills on the kitchen floor. All manner of liquid and solid nastiness languishes there until somebody (primarily me) can't stand it anymore.
  • Psychiatrists NEVER call back on a holiday weekend.
  • If my grocery cart is full AND it has begun raining, then you can rest assured that I've parked in the space that is furthest from both the entrance AND the cart corral.
  • I'll think of a great idea for a story or a blog post and write it down...and then lose the paper.
  • I write phone numbers down, thinking that I'll remember whose number it is. Thirty-six hours later, I don't even remember writing it in the first place.
  • When going on a trip, it seems to take longer to get to your destination than it does to come home.
  • Any visit with the grandkids is never long enough.
  • Any visit to a government-run office is too long.
  • When The Boy and I have had a battle of wits and wills, and I think I may just run away because I can't stand the insanity one more second - I go for a mental health drive and come back, ready to face some more.
  • Most parents think raising babies and toddlers is so hard...and then, some day in the future, they wish they could go back to those "simpler" days.
  • Waiting for the "right" time to accomplish something may mean that you miss out on wonderful experiences because the time is never "right". For example, there's no right time to have a baby. There will always be trips you want to take, things you want to do, bills you want to pay off, a nestegg you want to build and stuff you want to buy - but the biological clock won't tick forever.
  • It takes The Boy approximately five minutes to unload the dishwasher - preceded by ten minutes of complaints that he "has to do EVERYTHING AROUND HERE".
  • Nobody ever died from an unmet 'want'...except for me - not having a Kindle is breaking my heart.
You'll miss me when I'm gone...I'm sure of it.


25 comments:

  1. OMG these are all SOOO true. So very true. I loved your last one. I can think of many wants that could put me 6 ft under from the craving of. ;)

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  2. You may not die from not getting something you want, but you can die from heartbreak. ;) Buttered toast not only always lands on the buttered side, but it usually lands on my clothes. Such is life.

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  3. Alright you had me LOL'ing quite a few times in there. The recipe ingredients going bad or missing ALWAYS happens to me- &it's totally always the last ingredient. Arrgh!

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  4. Love it! Especially the mental health drive and *dying* for a Kindle. I hope the Easter Bunny brings you one. :)

    I did this prompt too.

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  5. When I read about the psych's never calling back, it reminded me of that movie What about Bob....you just have to go with them, fish around neck and all!

    And I hope you get your Kindle, I would like one of those but I'm holding out for the ipad first!

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  6. I would be sad to lose you over the lack of a Kindle. Perhaps you should start a Paypal donation account to raise money to buy one. It would be for a good cause.

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  7. Brilliant! I especially like "no right time." So true!!!

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  8. Funny that you mentioned buttered toast because I dropped mine this morning..guess which side hit the floor??

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  9. I hope you win a Kindle. Toddlerhood seems tough now. I am nervous about the later years.

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  10. OH truer words have never been uttered. There is never a right time for anything, ever. I can't even get my son's doctors to call back any day forcing me to change doctors..

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  11. Loved it all, June! I keep thinking you and I are living in a parallel universe...only minus The Boy! :)

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  12. Visiting from Mama Kat's -
    Love your post today! I can totally relate to the "mental health drives"; took quite a few of those around the block when my son was an adolescent!
    And wanting the simpler times back. So, so true!
    Thanks for the smiles today!

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  13. What are you waiting for? BUY THE KINDLE! You *need* it.

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  14. LOVE this list! The recipe thing is 100% true for me every time!!! And my favorite is this line: Waiting for the "right" time to accomplish something may mean that you miss out on wonderful experiences because the time is never "right". So true! Visiting from Mama Kat's.

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  15. Love this list. It's so funny because just the other night hubby was saying (on the way home from a restaurant) "How come it always seems so nuch shorter going home?" LOL

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  16. Love your list, especially the one about The Boy unloading the dishwasher! My kids do EXACTLY the same thing, no matter what it is I tell them to help with. Such melodrama!

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  17. What's sad is I have a kindle and I never use it. Who has time? Too busy reading blogs!

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  18. So very true! Great list and so funny!

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  19. OH, I'll miss you! I loved this post. I identified with so many things on the list, and several made me laugh out loud. (No, I don't really use LOL).

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  20. I think white shirts have tomato (and chocolate) stain magnets built in.

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  21. I'm going to hope that that Kindle shows up to your house. It will happen. :)

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  22. The tomato and chocolate manufacturers have a deal with the detergent/bleach/stain removal cartel. It's a conspiracy, I tell ya!

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  23. Great post! I could relate to a lot of what you know! Thanks for making me laugh. I hope you get your kindle very soon!

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Thanks for stopping by. I love your comments...I get all warm inside just reading them!