April 01, 2011

Red Writing Hood: She Drives Me Crazy!


I decided to try an assignment at The Red Dress Club today. The instructions:

Is there someone who drives you crazy?

Someone who really gets under your skin.

It doesn't have to be someone you know (although it certainly can be). It could be someone famous. Or even a character in a book.

Now, write a first-person piece - as if YOU are this individual. Write from that perspective and include the things that really bother you about this person.

This can be completely fictional or you can base it on a real-life person.

Word limit is 600.

It's Not Easy Being Me
It’s such a burden being a widow. I have no time to myself, my children are nuisances – and my stepdaughter, that awful Cinderella! – she’s impossible to live with. She’s always cavorting with those woodland creatures, getting feathers and fur inside the house. She’s an ungrateful brat – after all I do for her! If it wasn’t for me, she’d be out in the street.

If I could marry off Anastasia or Drizella, I’d have it made. I’m so looking forward to the Prince’s ball. I just know that he’ll fall in love with one of MY girls. Sure, they aren’t much to look at, but they come from fine stock. Cinderella, on the other hand – HER mother was as common as they come, and Cinderella is just like her. She should be grateful I’m letting her do all this housework, since that is her lot in life, to be in servitude to others.

Such a lazy, ungrateful wench! As soon as we move to the castle, I’ll palm off Cinderella to a local merchant who needs a housekeeper. She’ll appreciate how strict I’ve been when she has a new boss who doesn’t care for her like I do.

Where IS that girl? Doesn’t she know that I expect my tea and crumpets exactly at 10am? Here it is, 10:02 already. She knows how I hate tardiness; I’ll have to teach her a lesson about punctuality, I will. And maybe I’ll make her sleep in the barn for a few nights, until she appreciates my generosity.

I heard that the Prince has his eye set on a girl from our village. I do hope it’s Anastasia. She’s my favorite – and will make a good wife for the Prince. She’s a bit dim, but very good natured. Hopefully when we move into the castle, Drizella can learn to be graceful from the ladies in waiting – that girl is so clumsy. I can’t help it that she has big feet.
Finally, the brat is here with my breakfast. And my tea is cold! I think that scrubbing the floors is a proper punishment for cold tea.

I hate to admit it, but Cinderella is a pretty girl – but only on the outside. The Prince would never fall for her – he’d look right past her face and see her as the lowly creature she is. He’d never look twice at a girl with such rough hands and tattered clothing.

If it wasn’t for me, she wouldn’t have any clothes at all. She’s lucky that I give her Drizella’s hand-me-down dresses. I know that she has to take them in and hem them to get them to fit her, but learning to sew is a necessary skill for a servant girl. I’ve not heard her thank me once for all the kindnesses I’ve given her.

I hear her singing in the kitchen. She’d get those floors done a lot faster if she didn’t sing and dance around. She’s a dawdler, that girl. She hasn’t even started making lunch yet. The girls and I are going shopping in a little while – we have to get new ball gowns. 

Our lives could change drastically after Friday’s ball. I could be the mother of a princess! Imagine that! Finally, we will have arrived at our proper station in life. I won’t miss Cinderella at all when SHE leaves. Good riddance to bad rubbish, I say!

Image source


15 comments:

  1. I like your take on the prompt! I have wondered what the stepmother would have seen, and now I know. I can see her saying and doing all these things. The last paragraph is perfect, "Good riddance to bad rubbish."

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hilarious! Great use of the prompt.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Okay, I loved this. How am I the first to comment? Maybe the Evil Stepmother has hidden all your commenters in the basement? I hope the mice are friendly.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Love it. Love it. Love it. Did I say I LOVE it? Cinderella is one of my all-time favorites, and this just made my day. It put me in a good mood, and even before my normal gallon of coffee. Very nicely done! Love it.

    ReplyDelete
  5. well done!! i havent come across anything quite like yours so far! :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Totally fun. I struggle for a character, but I like who you picked.

    I love how her inner dialogue reflects the story so well.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Who likes the evil stepmother anyway, right? Great take on the prompt!

    The rants and raves wok perfectly for her character.

    Loved this: "I hear her singing in the kitchen. She’d get those floors done a lot faster if she didn’t sing and dance around. She’s a dawdler, that girl." -Ridiculous & hilarious!

    Poor Cinderella. :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. You so have that evil step-mother down.
    I like that she thinks she's doing Cinderella such a favor.
    Good job!

    ReplyDelete
  9. This was wonderful fun to read, I love how living in the castle for the step-mother is in her mind, a foregone conclusion and it made me so happy to know just how wrong she is!

    In these lines I felt that you just nailed her so well, "She’s lucky that I give her Drizella’s hand-me-down dresses. I know that she has to take them in and hem them to get them to fit her, but learning to sew is a necessary skill for a servant girl. I’ve not heard her thank me once for all the kindnesses I’ve given her."

    ReplyDelete
  10. As always, you truly inspire me. That was a great take on Cinderella. Loved it.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I love where you took the prompt. And I actually sympathized with the Wicked Step Monster for a minute. You did a great job writing this.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm thinking The Mister dodged a very big bullet with this one. Great job as always.

    ReplyDelete
  13. That was fantastic! I still don't like her...

    ReplyDelete
  14. I sympathized with her for the first paragraph and then? Back to evil. lol

    Great take on the post!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Gee, were you visiting my house and decided to blog about ME????? LOL Loved this. Fun, whimsical and totally a trip. I wanted to track down Cinderell and beat the dust out of her, too ;)

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for stopping by. I love your comments...I get all warm inside just reading them!