June 25, 2011

Saturday Centus - 06/25/11

That Jenny Matlock! Changing up the rules yet again. Today's Saturday Centus prompt (appearing below, in bold text) shall be accompanied by no more than sixty words (in honor of week 60 of this meme). I'm so glad she didn't do it this way every week...can you imagine the conniption fit my brain would have with, say, two words? Oiy vey!



I decided to follow Jenny's lead and shake things up a bit myself. Today, you get three (count 'em, THREE) submissions for the price of one.

Domestic Coorespondence
Dear John,
Why can't you be like your friend, the oven, and clean yourself?

Effervescently yours,
June


Corporate Coorespondence

Date: 6/25/1837
Re: Product Branding


Mr. John Finklestein,

After numerous discussions, the board has selected a company name and logo. Rest assured, Dear John, that your suggestion ('Finklestein's Farm Implements') was given full consideration, though in the end, it was rejected.


In all future coorespondence, please refer to the Company as John Deere.


Stanley T. Frankmueller, COO

Financial Coorespondence

Dear John,
Leave the money on my dresser when you're done. You can pick me up on that same corner the next time you need my "services". Please don't hesitate to recommend me to your friends!


Thanks!

The Happy Hooker



23 comments:

  1. You are so darn clever and hilarious!! I'm so envious!! But in a good, I'm so happy you're my friend, kind of way!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, June, You done done it now! These are perfect. I love all three of them because they are equally delightful and so very different. You do know how to write down good words.

    Namaste.........cj

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow! Three for one--they all are great!
    Donna

    ReplyDelete
  4. Very Clever and outstanding offerings June. Leave it to you to be freakin' amazing and doing 3 for the price of one ! That'll give Jenny pause for sure next time she slams us a wicked one !!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. So very cool...that poor old John yeah be more like a friendly oven instead of the normal kind! Great stuff!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Very clever...quite diverse and humorous...well done! Peace and blessings

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hi this was very gllod made me smile thank you for sharing

    ReplyDelete
  8. OMG! These are priceless!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Excellent, June. You're so fun and imaginative!
    I especially like the last line in the corporate correspondence.
    Cheers.

    ReplyDelete
  10. HIlarious June!!! love your wit and humour!

    ReplyDelete
  11. hahahaah. great job. I especially liked the last one. :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. P.S. I haven't wished you congrats on your new grandbaby yet!! Russell is so beautiful! (uh,handsome?!) Ahhh, it's okay for boy babies to be beautiful!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Yay! A three-fer! Great job making us laugh, June! You have such impressive wits...I mean, wit! LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Laffin out loud at the last one.

    ReplyDelete
  15. You were wound up today! All clever expressions of your creativity!!!

    ReplyDelete
  16. I can't tell you how many times I wished the dear john would just clean itself! Lol!Very good!~Ames

    ReplyDelete
  17. I'm torn between the first one and the third one as my favorite!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Lolz! Cheesy stuff for a cheesy fella! Good one ;)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Love it! Love it! Love it! Thanks for the laugh! You are a gem!

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for stopping by. I love your comments...I get all warm inside just reading them!