It's been a long time.
I've missed writing (and especially reading) posts.
I think the fog is lifting in this bout with depression. If I had to rate the shittiness of my outlook, I can comfortably report that my score has started to decline. I'd give myself 4 septic tanks (out of a possible ten (10)).
It's no bed of roses, yet - but it no longer feels like each day has me clawing my way out of a deep well just to see daylight.
I still struggle with getting up, and a shower is a major accomplishment (I'm sure my co-workers appreciate my effort, no matter how infrequent). I now average four days a week where I don't want to forget where the office is and assume the fetal position in my darkened bedroom.
My alarm clock has extremely high self-esteem, as it keeps working despite the litany of insults and curse words I throw its way each morning.
I've had two good weekends in a row, and am expecting this next weekend to be positive, too.
Hope has returned to the building.
I submitted a poem to a contest, and am working on some more for another submission. Perhaps the writing mojo will return on a semi-regular basis.
For stress relief, I started coloring. I feel kinda weird about it, since it's so trendy. I am not a follower - but I guess getting on the colorist (yes, we call ourselves colorists - like our next job is with an up-and-coming hair salon) bandwagon is a tad sight better than thinking this is just the first step toward my second childhood and a future wearing housedresses, sandals with socks, and telling young children to "get the hell off my lawn!".
There's been a simultaneous improvement in cooperation regarding domestic activities at home. Not once over the past two weekends did I want to immediately run away from the mess and return to my clean (yet lonely) apartment.
The Mister and I even had a date night. Dinner and a movie - it's been ages since the two of us have been out and about together in a non-grocery store activity. Like all of our personal and intimate interactions, the evening ended with a polite and chaste handshake at the bedroom door. :)
I promise to stop my blog reading embargo, strike, or whatever euphemism I can use to sugarcoat my slacker attitude. I'll do better - so I expect all of you to entertain me like always.
Thank you for your kind thoughts - I appreciate it far more than you know.