May 27, 2009

Your Assignment, Should You Choose to Accept

Once again, back by popular demand (ok, not popular demand, but just for me, I'm doing Mama's Losin' It's writing prompt...I think I'll do two, it's just that much fun!

1. What is your life's anthem? You know...that song that is ALWAYS in your head. The one you'd go to sing first if someone told you to sing a song right NOW. What is it and what does it mean to you?
(inspired by Tattooed Minivan Mom)

This one is so easy! "If I Only Had a Brain" is the song that runs through my head all day. Why? Because there's nothing else to keep it from running roughshod in there!

And for you Youtube phobes, here are the lyrics:

I could while away the hours, conferrin' with the flowers
Consultin' with the rain.
And my head I'd be scratchin' while
my thoughts were busy hatchin'
If I only had a brain.
I'd unravel every riddle for any individ'le,
In trouble or in pain.
With the thoughts you'll be thinkin'
you could be another Lincoln
If you only had a brain.
Oh, I could tell you why The ocean's near the shore.
I could think of things I never thunk before.
And then I'd sit, and think some more.
I would not be just a nothin' my head all full of stuffin'
My heart all full of pain.
I would dance and be merry, life would be a ding-a-derry,
If I only had a brain.

6. Share a sleep walking story of your own!!
One morning, I awoke at 4:22 (aka zero dark thirty). Wide awake, out of a dead sleep. No noise awakened me, just some nagging sense that some weird stuff was going on. Immediately, I jumped up, not turning on any lights, and went to my five year old son's room...the bed was empty, the room was dark. I glanced down our bowling alley-sized lights were lit, but a sliver of light was encroaching from the slightly opened front door (I guess you'd say the door was ajar, but to this day, I'm convinced it was still a door).

You know, that triangle of light that usually comes from the clouds in a 1950s movie about some nun that has some superhuman power? Well, in this case, the light was coming in horizontally, not from the heavens. This always, dear reader, indicates that something BAD has happened - remember, vertical sunbeam, God-inspired visual effect; horizontal light - the door has been opened by person or persons unknown.

We then lived in an apartment building, our doorway opened into a hallway, with stairs leading to the second floor...and the scary basement.

Since my son has always done the unpredictable, it has been my policy to sleep fully clothed. After all, in my home, one never knows when 911 must be summoned, or when being in a state of undress and having to leap tall buildings in a single bound would be a very frightening (and jiggly) experience for all concerned. But I digress...

I walked into the outer hallway, no boy. I went into the basement, wishing I had worn something on my feet (fully clothed in this instance does not include footwear, sensible or otherwise)...again, no sign of the boy.

My only other option: the front door, leading to the street. We lived in a city neighborhood. The street was bisected by a light rail system (trolley), which started its morning route about the time I woke up. I dashed out the door, down the steps, and voila!, there's the boy, standing on the sidewalk, ready to walk between parked cars and go into the street and toward the tracks! I called his name, and he responded, "MOM!" He stopped in his tracks. I got him turned around and led him back into the apartment. He came willingly, which let me know that he was either 1) asleep, or, 2) the victim of a hideous alien abduction. Even now (he's almost 14), this kid never does what I ask unless snack foods are promised.

Anyway, I get the lad inside, and decide that any remaining sleep must be done from my bed, so I can keep an eye on him. As I tucked him in, he said, "I don't like you very much right now." I haven't heard that little gem before.

When it was REALLY time to wake up, I told him what he had done. He looked at me like I was the biggest liar on the face of this Earth and said, "Go to YOUR ROOM!"


  1. Somehow in my mind "If I Only Had A Brain" is always followed by "Talk to the Animals'. Now you have both of them running through my head!

  2. love your anthem! Cute story about your boy! I think I will have some stories like that with my girls if they take after there dad.

  3. Dan - Now that makes two of us! Thanks!

  4. Amy - Thank you! I often think my son takes after his dad, seems the genes override actual involvement in his life.

  5. I love the story of your son sleepwalking... you are a great storyteller!

  6. Thanks, Laura! My son gives me material to write about every day...much to his dismay! You can read more about him on my blog.

  7. Visiting from Mama Kats...

    Oh...what a perfect theme song! I might have to adopt it for mine too! It is just . so . fitting!

    And that is such a freaky story!! I can't even imagine!!! I would immediately buy like 100 locks to put on the door.

  8. Wow. It is a good thing your mom superpower woke you up in time.

  9. "(I guess you'd say the door was ajar, but to this day, I'm convinced it was still a door)."

    My silk blouse now has coffee stains on it since I spit my iced coffee out after reading that. Your a funny woman. Where do I send the dry cleaning bill?

  10. Great sleepwalking story. I'm glad you got to him before he went into the street.

  11. Wow. That is so crazy! I am SO glad that you woke up like that. I also love how he never does anything unless a snack is involved. Boys are SO funny : ).

  12. Soxy Deb - Sorry about the silk blouse. You can send the blouse to me, it will go in the dusty plastic bag of dry cleaning I've gathered from other coffee spitters. I'm thinking of opening a museum.

  13. Lol love the song, from one of my favorite movies!

    Ho scary that your son did that, good thing you woke up when you did!

  14. just dropping by from that writers workshop thing on mama kat. you have a pretty nifty site here :)

  15. Thanks, Jenny! Nifty? Really? Aww, shucks!


Thanks for stopping by. I love your comments...I get all warm inside just reading them!