June 30, 2009

Holiday Icon Exposed!

WARNING: Get the children out of the room. I'm about to shatter a childhood illusion here. Go ahead, I'll wait.

Are they gone now? Good.

Dateline: Florida - Easter, 2009.

First, let me say that I've had this picture for a couple of months now. Right away, I wanted to bring this serious issue out into the open, but I was afraid for the world's children and grandchildren. (That, and I wanted to gaze longingly at these beautiful kiddos a bit longer by myself).

Just look at the picture of my grandchildren with the Easter Bunny.

Yes, the grandchildren are gorgeous and adorable and well-dressed and all that. Now REALLY look.

Look carefully at the Easter Bunny. Come on, people, look HARD. Lives could depend on this! (Well, not really - I've just always wanted to type that).

Have you ever seen thighs that BIG on an animal that eats only vegetables? Come on, now! There's no way this creature was hoppin' down the bunny trail unless it ended at the All-You-Can-Eat buffet at Ponderosa.

After careful consideration, the only conclusion I can come to is this: THE EASTER BUNNY IN THIS PIC IS NOT REAL. I know, it's hard to take. But we just have to pull on our big girl panties here and deal with it.

I urge you all to look at your own Easter Bunny photo ops to see if this is an isolated incident, or it's part of some grand conspiracy. I mean, damn you Cadbury! (I've always wanted to type that, too). The world is waiting to find out. Don't let me down here.

Remember, it's about the children.


  1. Aha! So this explains my large thighs. I eat too many vegetables. I knew my mom was wrong! Damn it!!

    BTW, congrats on the win at PPP for The Letter. I loved that letter. So sad, yet was probably very cathartic for you. Believe everything you wrote because it's probably true.

    (And just to make things a little freaky, my word verification is newdeda, which kinda sounds like a kid name for New Daddy. Weird, huh?)

  2. And I don't think the bunny ate too many veggies - I think she probably lined up lots of times at the dessert bar (personal experience here).

    Thanks, Mo. Yep, everything in the letter was true. And it WAS cathartic, and a bit sad, to write it.

  3. So, the Easter Bunny is a GIRL?

    I am shattered.

  4. Fragrant,
    Yep, I'm thinking the Bunny is a girl - men just don't get thighs like that. Also, she has the 'baby pooch' thing goin' on, too.

  5. Ah, the elusive Mrs. Bunny, rarely seen in public. This picture will probably be worth money some day - even if only because of the adorable kids. How cute they are!

  6. not real? I am devastated,, the rabbit not the thighs,,


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