December 02, 2009

I've Been Negligent...I've Been Sad

As the only girl among four boys, I missed the whole sister experience. When I was six years old, that changed. I got my first sister, Nancy, my sister-in-law. She married my oldest brother, Stan. My brother Greg was ring bearer; I was the flower girl at the wedding.

Greg, Nancy, me

Nancy, former Miss Kelly Air Force Base, a pretty Texan who has that sweet drawl. I still wonder after all these years what she saw in my brother.

I kid. My oldest brother Stan is a wonderful man...for a grump. They've been married for 46 years.

When I was little, she had her first experience with real snow with my younger brother and me, her first ride on a sled (and her first butt-shattering fall on the pavement when the sled moved before she got on. She wrote letters, telling us about life in TX. I cried every time they left after a visit. She and I even share the same birthday.

When my dad died of lung cancer in 1983, we cried together, and laughed at the man with the biggest nose known to man who showed up at the funeral home. When my mom was experiencing her first symptoms of Alzheimer's, we spent a lot of time talking about the past, and what was going to happen to my mom in the future.

Nancy - daughter, sister, friend, wife, mother, grandmother, retired government employee. She is a wonderful human being, she and my brother have always been kind and supportive over the decades. Here they are at Erin's wedding in August:

Stan, Nancy, Daryl, The Boy, me, Erin, The Mister

Now she has a new title - cancer victim. A week ago, she found out she has uterine cancer. I found out on Saturday when her son put a message on Facebook. Nancy didn't want to ruin everyone's Thanksgiving with the news, since she still doesn't know what stage her disease is at, and has no idea what her prognosis might be.

Her only sister, Carole, died a few years ago from cancer. My brother Stan has been dealing with bladder cancer for four years.

They've had enough. It's hard not to say that it's not fair.

But life is often not fair.

Her new oncologist only sees new patients on Friday...we await further news. Hopefully, we'll add cancer survivor to her list of titles.


  1. oh my goodness. It sounds like their family and yours are dealing with so much. Sorry...
    Glad you have each other to lean on.

  2. That is a lot to handle for them, I am sorry for your bad news and will hope all works out well. I understand the whole sister-in-law deal too, I didn't have a sister either and now have two sisters in law that I adore!

  3. To Nancy and her next title - Cancer Survivor! It's a growing club.

  4. I am so sorry. I just want to cry every time someone uses that nasty word-- you're right it IS unfair. How can we go to the moon and still not have an idea how to kick this terrible disease?!

  5. Aswwww...I'm so sorry to hear this. She sounds like a true sister to you (love those photos) and I'm praying for her to beat this thing.

  6. Beautifully written post. Just catching up on your writing.

    I enjoy your style very much.


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