June 28, 2011

Four Things - The Ideal Slacker Meme

That Jenners is a sweetie! She turned me onto The Four Things Meme - the perfect gift for a slacker like me. All I have to do is answer four questions, in various categories.

Easy peasy! And it's one less than that annoying Five Words Meme Jenners forced me to do earlierI previously posted.

Four jobs I've had:
  • Inventory taker. Yes, I was one of those poor souls wearing an ill-fitting smock, calculator strapped around my waist. Crawling on dusty floors, reaching into the back of dusty shelves, assuring store owners of what merchandise they had on hand. The worst thing to count? Greeting cards and big metal bins of Scotch tape. The most interesting locations? Waldenbooks (I was slow there...look, books!), and an adult video store, where I first came across that classic, Eleven Inch Tube Steak.
  • Mall kiosk jewelry sales. I wear very little jewelry, don't really care about it at all. The worst part of the job? Being asked my countless customers "Where is the bathroom?" Do I look like I work at the Information booth? Also, our kiosk was right beside the holiday train display. So we had crowd noise, crying children and the cacophony caused by the stupid train ride. Customers seemed to call on the phone every time the train left the depot. I'd have to crouch down on the floor so I could hear them. The most interesting customers (and by 'interesting', I mean disgusting)? The man who lacked basic hygiene skills asking if I could mail a sterling silver cross to prison, and the lady who insisted on shopping after her four-year old sprayed herself in the face with perfume at a department store counter.
  • Package pickup/telephone operator/Cash office closer - yep, all three in one job. Best part of the job? Speaking over the PA system, reminding Christmas shoppers that the store was closing in x number of minutes. I had a nice delivery - a mix of holiday joy and snark. Worst part of the job? Cash office at closing time. Imagine, tired employees, cash bags in hand, rushing to the window to deposit their money and get the hell out of Dodge (or Montgomery Ward, as the case may be). It was my job to get them to initial a spreadsheet when they handed in a bag, indicating that they turned in the cash. One night, a department manager insisted that SHE TURNED IN HER BAGS. Store security was summoned to review the tape from the Cash Office. I was being implicated in some sort of shady dealing, and all I wanted to do was go home. Finally, after a search of the entire store, she found her bags on top of a round rack in the Ladies department. 
  • Telephone support center representative. I actually liked this job. I was working at a company that did all the programming and system support for Defense Department hospitals throughout the world. Frantic phone calls were an everyday occurrence - and I served as 'telephone Valium' - calming them down enough to report the actual problem, so we could figure out a solution. I talked to many nice people (when they weren't screaming about system crashes and stuff). I later transferred to work at one of the sites I had previously provided support too. My former co-workers would get me all sorts of shit about needing to report problems, since I was supposed to know how everything worked already. Well, excuse me!

Four books I'd re-read over and over:
A Tree Grows in Brooklyn
A Girl Called Zippy
Julie and Julia
Benjamin Franklin: An American Life

Four places I have lived:
This was hard, I have moved a lot. But before you hang the moniker 'gypsy' on me, know that we never moved in the middle of the night (though it may have been dark that one time).
  • Vista, CA
  • Nashville, TN
  • Gaithersburg, MD
  • Pittsburgh, PA
If I die and go to Hell, I am sure it will look just like Gaithersburg.

Four books I would recommend:
Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand
A Girl Called Zippy by Haven Kimmel
In Zanesville by S. J. Watson
The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath

Four places I have been:
I am not a world traveler, and have never traveled outside North America. But I have been in these places:
  • Hot water
  • Deep trouble, Mister
  • Dreamland
  • A World of Hurt
Four of my favorite foods:
  • Chicken with Garlic Sauce
  • Grilled pork steak
  • Pizza (pepperoni and mushrooms, please)
  • French bread, with the perfect proportion of crunchy crust and soft center (and butter)

Four of my favorite drinks:
  • Coke Zero
  • Iced tea (unsweetened)
  • Margarita (on the rocks, with salt on the rim)
  • Semi-annual mocha (even though I don't drink coffee, every once in a while, a mocha hits the spot)

Four places I would rather be right now:
  • Florida, visiting the grandkids
  • Anywhere, with the grandkids
  • A bigass family reunion (not to say that all of my relatives have big asses)
  • Poolside, with Raoul the cabana boy keeping my glass filled

Four things that are special in my life:
  • Family
  • Continued good health
  • A good book
  • Indoor plumbing

Four bloggers who I hope will do this meme. I don't wish to name names, but here are some suggested blogging situations that might make this meme a perfect excuse for a well-thought-out post:
  • When inspiration has left you high and dry
  • When you want to share tidbits about yourself (for an eventual quiz and giveaway at a later date)
  • When you hope that you'll be able to entice other bloggers to spill their guts
  • When you just decide to say, "What the hell!", and go for it!


  1. I cracked up at Eleven Inch Tube Steak, and then read on (too quickly) and thought you wrote MALE kiosk jewelry sales. In a split second I wondered if you posed as a male or sold only male jewelry...then I reread it.

    LOVE the places you have been.

    You are such an entertainer.

  2. Hey June! I was so excited when I found out that you, too, loved "A Girl Named Zippy", and "She Got Off the Couch." We talked about that at the first SW meeting you came to, I think? High Fives on great choices!

  3. Oh my. I loved the descriptions of your jobs. I was thinking about if I would even be able to answer all those questions.

    coke zero, yum. And margarita. salted rim. heaven. running my tongue over the rim.......wait, where was I.

  4. Loved this! The job stuff was just interesting ... it makes almost all of my jobs seem like dream jobs!!! And I love your four places you have been! It always interests me how different this meme ends up in different hands.

    P.S. Sorry for the 5 horrible words. Seems you are holding a bit of grudge there.


Thanks for stopping by. I love your comments...I get all warm inside just reading them!